Friday, September 11th, 2009

proof read my essay?

sly_2314 asked:


Barack Obama

Barack Obama will make an outstanding president. He is level headed and has the nation’s best interest at heart. Even though I don’t agree with some of his views, he has the same opinion on most of the issues that I do. What makes him stand out from Hilary Clinton, and John Adams? Well for starters, he will be the first African American democratic president. Also his stand on Civil Rights, Education, and Immigration will be most effective.

The issues that I am concerned about are Civil Rights- rights of civilians and U.S citizens. Illegal immigration- people who come into a country illegally and Education- the education of children and teens. Obama is also concerned and has developed plans to address these issues. Several I agreed with, and some I do not.

Obama stands on Civil Rights are that he thinks racial and religious profiling is wrong, which I agree with. He also thinks that same *** marriage is wrong, which I strongly disagree with, but I still support him
. In addition he also plans on strengthening the civil rights, expand drug use rehabilitation programs, and fix voting fraud.

Education is a very important issue for me; I think it’s very critical to improve it, being a student. Obama pledges to tackle the ongoing issue of “No child left behind”. This is a program that causes teachers to only prepare students to fill in a bubbles on a standardize tests. He will do his best to improve the assignments. He will also support the schools that need the most improvement, instead of punishing them. Another ongoing issue is the number of people dropping out of school. Again, Obama will do his best, by providing funding to schools.

Finally there’s the issue of illegal immigration. Illegal immigration has increased severely as years passed by. Americans are fearful of the thought of drug traffickers, dangerous people, and their jobs. Obama has vowed to make things better. He vowed to make the borders stronger, work in Mexico to help make it a
better place to live, and improve the immigration system. I agree with what he will do completely. If he is elected president he would most likely ease the number of illegal immigrants.

In conclusion I strongly believe that Obama will make an exceptional president. I believe this not only on his stand on Education, Illegal Immigration, and Civil Rights. His stands on taxes, stem cell research, gun control, health care, social security, and the war in Iraq.
blech
okay so ima clear things up…
the subject was to write an essay about who would make a good president.
I’m also just getting into politics so i dun know that much(im 14).

Tags: , ,

This entry was posted on Friday, September 11th, 2009 at 8:14 pm and is filed under Proof Reading. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

4 Responses to “proof read my essay?”

smcwhtdtmc Says:
September 11th, 2009 at 9:27 pm

Do your own homework.

rotorhead Says:
September 14th, 2009 at 11:01 pm

First of all, I feel that Obama’s lack of political and executive experience leave him unqualified to hold the office of President. For him to say he would pull our troops out of Iraq also shows his lack of understanding of military matters. Any stance of his for stronger gun control would mean he is anti-2nd Amendment. We are already strangling the 2nd Amendment. Immigration? Anything plan other than to deport all illegals, prosecute companies and individuals who hire them, and deny them anything other than emergency medical care, will be a losing stance and panders only to the Hispanic vote. What stand on Civil Rights? I think that issue has been settled. Don’t listen to opportunistic racists like Sharpton and J. Jackson.

But that is neither here nor there. Obama will be unable to carry the South in the General Election. Your old South Wallace Democrats are not going to vote for a Black candidate. Simple as that. The Black vote alone is not going to be anywhere hear enough. And without the South, he cannot win.

ross Says:
September 14th, 2009 at 11:47 pm

Your essay gives the reasons he should be elected President. But you mention his race. Is race really a good reason to pick a President..any better than gender, nationality, color of hair or place of birth? Is race a sympathy thing or a real need?

But the rest of the essay gives what you think are his strong points, and since you can’t go into how he compares with others, that’s OK.

Flyflinger Says:
September 16th, 2009 at 7:35 am

So what you are saying you like him because he is a Socialist?
You are saying that you lack the ability to take care of yourself and you are willing to pay the government to take care of you like you were a baby. That is called a slave to the government. Oh no wait a minute you are for civil rights so you must be against slavery.
Hummmmmmm make up your mind. Maybe you need to think like a realist and rewrite your essay.

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.